September 02, 2007 |
going to the mall is an explosion of sensory perception that i can't quite handle anymore. i get a headache and my vision blurs, and i'm walking in a haze. hot girls everywhere. children running and screaming. shut up kids, i'm trying to think. loud music. people everywhere. too many people. why am i here? oh yeah, pants. i need pants. my old pants don't fit anymore. i used to be able to walk into a store like american eagle, standing tall and confident, foolishly convinced that every girl was staring at me and wanted to fuck me. now i think they wonder if i'm lost. i am lost. why am i here? oh yeah, pants. i need pants. my old pants don't fit anymore. shut up kids, i'm trying to think. in another lifetime i worked at a store like this. no, i don't need help finding anything. please don't talk to me. stay away. do i need help? no, thanks. just stay the fuck away, i have a metal bar in my chest. oh wait, no i don't. it only feels like i do. c'mon kids, just shut up for a second. i need to think, so it doesn't have to be like this, and then we can run and scream together.
© barry reinschreiber