August 01, 2013 |
the dream is always the same. no, wait, that's just a line from a popular movie. in fact, the dream is consistently completely different. in this one, i have undergone a surgical procedure to attach a second penis. evidently i had seen it in pornography (dual-peni, that is), thought it was awesome, and had to get it for myself. it would be fair for us to assume that this probably involved travel to some foreign destination, in order to find a medical professional that could match me in terms of insanity and irresponsibility. at home after the operation, i see this alien appendage violently, gruesomely affixed to my body. hanging next to the old one, i have no idea how they made room for it, or where they got it from, or why they chose to ignore basic principles of symmetry by selecting an uncircumcised one, but it's there. only then do i question the thinking behind this abomination, and why anybody, in their right mind or otherwise, would want a detached penis of unknown origin permanently mated to their body. unable to come up with a single reason, i immediately decide it would probably be best to undo this whole thing. somehow i knew that i would have the money to remove it, but it would be terribly scary, and this whole thing was terribly stupid. overwhelmed with disappointment in myself, i felt that i finally went too far, and i was lost, gone forever. i woke up terrified, my heart pounding, and instantly reached for my crotch. it was only me. i had been there all along.
© barry reinschreiber